Thursday, July 11, 2013

My week as a mother of six

My week as a mother of 6.
Whew. Ask me three things. 
1. Did I ever put make up on?
2. Is the laundry I started Monday, finished?
3. Is my house clean?
Of course not!!! Don't ask me such stupid questions. It's been an exciting, enjoyable busy week. I am not cut out for it. Give me a room full of 36 3rd graders any day. But a house full of 6 kids ranging between the ages of 12 and 2.... I would tell you to ask me in a few weeks. I am not cut out for this everyday of my life. Haha I had a lot of respect for my aunt before this adventure. She has incredible children. 4 boys 1 girl. All potty trained, all polite, well mannered, helpful and kind. Zachs room was cleaned up every single night. Every night we would have a movie night. The living room would be a disaster. All I would say is that we need to clean it up. Ten min later, a blanket was laid out to sit on so popcorn stayed off the carpet and everyone was in their Jammie's and beds laid out.  Seriously these kids are amazing. I raise zach the way Martha is raising hers because i look up to her so much. So let me tell you about our week and then I will tell you why I can't do 6 kids. 
Sunday night- my family is close. Extremely close. We have an extended family that is far superior to yours. And don't get me started on my grandparents. Each month we have an extended family home evening. This month it was at my uncle Johnny's house. Martha and I had decided we would just trade cars at home evening so Brian and I drove our truck just in case we couldn't trade cars and needed to squish all the kiddos in the cab....or bed. The was great. We talked about love and the different types of love. It was great. Afterwards, we went outside and traded keys, cars and spoke with Martha about the following week. The kids said their farewells, and we drove off. The kids have never seen our house before so of course the drive home was a barrage of questions. "How big is it" "is it bigger than your other one cause that thing was tiny" "is it haunted" (this freaking question comes up all the time for two reasons. Martha is obsessed with ghosts and things. Also max and Emily are idiots and tell four year olds about ghosts and that my basement is haunted) "how many rooms" "where are we going to sleep" "does rylie live with you" (she is our black lab). Anyway the list goes on but you can imagine. Brian and I answer all their questions, all while admiring, and concocting a plan to steal their 2012 Honda pilot that we now have keys too. 
We arrive at our house and the kids automatically start critiquing it. But when we walk in....that's when it goes nuts! My teacher brain looking back, would have stopped the kids before we opened the door, asked them to touch their ears if they can hear me, and explain some rules. One at a time, take of your shoes, put them on the shoe rack, line up your bags behind the couch, ect ect. Instead this is what happened. Door opened, and boom! The yogurt exploded. ( get it. The yogurt has so much energy built up, and when you open it, the yogurt explodes everywhere). Shoes where everywhere, bags where dropped, and kids went flying. Two down the hallway, two down the stairs, and two got run over. We stopped them. Explained the official tour would take place after all the shoes were on the rack, and the bags were lined up behind the couch. After two min of regrouping, the tour took place. Nothing exciting, except they loved Zachs room. Everyone was getting settled, then Brian got a phone call. We gave Martha the wrong key.....  An hour later, after all was exchanged correctly, we settled in for our first night in. The kids were all laying down, things organized, the homework packets were on the kitchen table and the plan for the following day was set in place.
MONDAY- I showed the kids where the cereal and milk were so when they woke up, they could feed themselves. I woke up and heard some rustles in the kitchen.  A few of the kiddos were eating, some where sleeping, including Zach, and we were on our way. Immediately the questions of what we were going to do today started. After some thought, we decided to go to the park. That lasted an hour. At the park, we burnt out butts in the flaming slide, dug holes, and Zach sliced his knee open and had blood running down his leg. We went home. It was now noon. Lunch was made, and a call was put  in to my mom. "Help" " I need ideas for this week" after a good convo with mama g, we had a weeks worth of activities. I began making sugar cookies, and pulled out my 100 different cookie cutters. You better believe we used all of them. Or what seemed like 100 frosted cookies later. That took a good four hours and kids were satisfied. Homework was done, kitchen was prepped for dinner, and Brian just had gotten home. My savior. These kids think Brian is a god, and swarm to him. S it was nice to not have to entertain when he got home. I snuck out to the gym after dinner, and the kids were watching a movie when I got home and ready for bed. Day one was a success. After I had Emily bring me extra wii controllers.
TUESDAY- the kids asked what we were going to do today, and my teacher brain kicked in. I gave them a schedule, told them we needed to go get swim suits, when we were having lunch, and that we were going to do some water games at my moms. (We actually were suppose to go swimming but that didn't turn out till thurs so we improvised at my parents. Max was a life saver here because I am the organized, fair, keep the peace rule maker. He is fun. Plain fun. Played all sorts of water games with the kids) then we were going to go back home. But in the meantime, they were in charge of what to do while I did chores. I am all about physical activity so my rule was they couldn't do the will till after our outside stuff, so in the morning, a hurricane went through Zachs room. It was a fun day, and I totally spaced doing the 5 year olds homework so vowed to do double time wed. My mom was great. I asked her if she would mind watching Zach wed and she graciously offered to watch him so I could take the kids to a movie.
WED- we woke bright and early, dropped Zach off at grandmas, and headed to the theater. On,y after buying illegal boxes of .99 candy stuffing them Into my oversized purse. Cinemark has a movie club during the summer, where previous g or pg shows are only 1.00$ per person. We saw Dolphins tail, all sharing one med drink, and having our own box of candy. The four year old was great, wiggling a ton and making random noises sometimes, but great none the less. We survived, made it back to the car all in one piece, and I patted my back for taking five kids to the store and theatre with out having any tears, wetted pants, or losing anyone. Successful day.
THURSDAY- today we actually went swimming. One kid less. This family is a soccer family. The 8 year old had a cache valley tourney, and left wed night. So we sun screened up, life jacketed, all made it I. The car, towels and all, and went to pick up my mom. Her friend and mine, Diane Gardner, was kind enough, and brave enough, to let me bring five kids swimming inner amazing pool with her two cute granddaughters. We dove, squirted, swam, played basketball, and got soaked. It was great, and a fun adventure. I know have experienced taking five kids to a death trap....which is a swimming pool. No tears where shed....except for Zach. He is a water wuss unless its in the tub. No one drowned. No one was sun burned, and all the toys were put back. Successful day.
FRIDAY-I am dropping the kids off Friday morning and then putting together a shower for my sister I law, Kylie. Good week. Exhausting but good.

Sorry this is so freaking long. Have to say, Brian is a saint. He could tell I was stressed, had a HUGE migrane tues, and didn't complain once about dinner or the house being a mess. He would come home, help with homework, play with the kids, and then let me go to the gym. Seriously, I married an all star. 
Also, these kids, again, I can't say it enough, are unbelievable. Best kids you will ever meet. S easy, wonderful kids. But they are kids. So why don't I want this many? Because. This is why.
1. Holy expensive.- they eat non stop. Non stop. Zach will have snack time, but it's usually like a cheese slice, or a gogo apple sauce. But having six kids and a snack time, two hours after breakfast? I was shocked. Huh? You just ate. You don't need a snack. That's crazy. Haha no it's not, but I just didn't even think of snack time and 6 kids.
2. Repeating myself. In a classroom, you have all the same aged kids, and you can practically make them listen to everything you say. All at once. But with kids aged 12-2, their attention spans, and hearing, and needs are all different. They would all be fine, sitting in the front room, when I would walk into the kitchen. One would see me pour myself some water so he needed water.  Another would see one kid leave, follow and see me pouring the first kids some milk. Ask what I was doing, and then ask for a drink too. Then. A third kids. Same thing. Finally the fourth or fifth kid, would come in, ask what I was doing, and I would sarcastically say, " what does it look like I am doing" . Man I know. But just because one is thirsty, why does it make all of them thirsty. Or need a snack or have to color, or what ever. 
3. Zach was the devil. Ok not the devil, but he needs a sibling or something because he didn't like sharing the attention. I lost count of how many timeouts he was put in for hitting, yelling, throwing a temper tantrum ect. He and the four year old flat out didn't get along. Which is weird, because usually there is not a problem at all. I want my sweet, calm child back.
4. My house is a mess. Just a total disaster.
5. Always having to do something. I don't know how many times I was asked what we were going to do now. Have time, my answer was, "rest" haha. Like I said, I am not the fun, sporadic cousin. That's max. I am a planner, organized cousin. So if I didn't have something planned, it was because it really was low down time. They colored, played in Zachs room, built towers, ect. It was fine. Imagination was blooming. 

Ok I don't have a ton of reasons why I do t want 6 kids, and in fact it was a lot of fun. I hope the kids enjoyed the self, but I am selfish. I didn't really get to hang out with Brian. Our conversations were mainly through text. 2 kids. I think that's my limit.
Fun week Martha. Let me know when I can do it again. Just give me time to clean my house, and make a bigger list of to do things. 
Sorry this was so long. Head over to Max's blog and he will give you twenty thousand cool points if you read this entire thing.  

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