Spring spring spring.

I love winter....for about two days. Then I get tired of shoes, hate my socks and get tired of the knots my hair gets in because of the hoodie I have to wear at all times. Oh and...drivers that think because they have four wheel drives, they can stop on a dime...cause their brakes are connected to their four wheel drive....wha....
Anyway, am not a big fan of winter, the cold and shoveling. But spring. Oh glorious spring. How my love for you grows each march. How do we know its on its way? Here is how!!!!
1. The snow to grass ratio is very much in favor of the brown, mushy grass.
2. Motorcycle gangs are out and about and making me jealous of their fresh air intake.
3. I don't wear a jacket outside anymore, even if its still cold.
4. I get to juggle, kick, and pull muscles again playing soccer in my backyard.
5. We can BBQ till 8 pm with just the light a plenty from the sun.
6. Rylie gets to play outside again!
7. FLIPFLOPS!!!!,
8. Family parties start getting planned and in the works.
9. I buy my siblings birthday presents. This is silly but this is the time I know it's on it's way. Our birthdays are feb march apr and may.
10. End of level test notifications are being sent out.

I had to at least get to ten. Sorry if that was lame. Haha thanks Kylie!

Novel Whore

Just as a precautionary step, as always, readers read at your own risk. I hide nothing, I may swear, I may offend, and I may ruin some books that you may not have read…or in this case, some movies too. You are warned.

I love books. Ask Max. But not just any book. I have a hard time picking up any old book and reading it. Nicholas Sparks, I am sorry. I have tried. I love you. I love your movies, but when it comes to your books, I can’t do it. I am, as you could say, a deeper meaning book whore. I can’t just read a book. I bury myself in it. The characters become my best friends. The mentors in the books become my mentors. Their trials are mine. Their feelings are mine. Their deaths….well don’t get me started….they are traumatic…..Half Blood Prince nearly ruined my fore coming senior year of high school. My brother and I talk, debate, delve, destroy and make everything more than what it probably was meant to be. We would be EXCELLENT English teachers. So reading a book that doesn't do that to me with in the first chapter…sorry…you’re dead to me.

But, keep reading, as I am fair. I have this personal belief, and let me emphasize, PERSONAL BELIEF. Doesn't make me right, doesn't mean you are wrong. I LOVE THE USA for that reason.  I believe that if you don’t vote, you have no right to complain. I didn’t vote, so I try to hold my tongue when it comes to our current Mr. President. Now don’t get confused, as this makes sense in what my blog tonight is about.

I watched the final chapter of the Twilight Series tonight…..see I can’t even remember its true name. Why did I watch it? Well some have said it was good, others have said it wasn’t. I see BAZILLIONS of post on Pintrest making fun of it, or comparing it to Hunger Games and Harry Potter, but I couldn’t complain because I haven’t read the books. Granted, I did read the first one….grudgingly. But I read it. It was good. It was an easy read. It was fine. But I had no desire to finish it. Yet, I had seen the movie after I read it, because that is generally my rule. Read a book, before it becomes a movie…..then I was trapped. Not the good trapped, but the, well I already started, I might as well finish trapped.  I saw the first movie, then the second, third, and finally the fourth this evening. Or fifth? I can’t even remember how many there are.  ANYWAY, wow I am getting off course. I finished the series. I wasn’t up at midnight at any off them, except one, to support my cheer leader sister and her dumb fundraisers. AND I PROMISE YOU, I STRAIGHTARMED A GROWN WOMEN. She was acting IDIOTIC and pushing me to the side and I stopped, put  my arms straight out and yelled KNOCK IT OFF. She of course ran right into my arm. It was the best part of the entire show. My point is, I have now seen them, all of them, and can now REALLY bitch about them.  Kind of. WARNING. This is me complaining about the movies. I have only read the first novel. I UNDERSTAND they may be different.

Harry Potter. I am a FULL HEARTED FAN. I have an actual acceptance letter AND wand on display in my front room for the entire world to see. I almost have my second collection of books, and three copies digitally. They are in my blood. My idol, Hermione. Not because she has a boyfriend, not because she is pretty….BECAUSE SHE IS THE best role model EVER. She stands for so many lifelong lessons. And yes, I am going to list some.

1.       Love is Loyal- Hermione stood by Harry the entire time though ALL the shit he had to endure.    She is the Samwise Gamgee of the wizard world. The true hero. We can all learn from her dedication to her family and friends. No matter how hard a situation became, she was there.

2.       That you can’t Apparate in or out of the Hogwarts grounds.

3.       That looks aren’t important

4.       Status quo’s are stupid.

5.       Love. Love with all your heart.

6.       Remember the better good. Study your ass off and you will become a rock star.

7.       Sacrifice for those that you love. Seriously, what did Bella give up? She tried giving up her family, but Stephanie Myer can’t write a book that ends with anything sad….assuming the book was like the movie. Hermione gave up her ENTIRE life. Her parents, her previous life, EVERYTHING, for the better good and her best friend. I cried a lot during this part of the novel. Probably as much as I did when Dumbledore and Dobby died. It was heart breaking.

8.       That she and Samwise gamgee, Katniss Everdeen and Bolt, would be on my Zombie Apocalypse team.

She and the rest of the Harry Potter family stand for so Many things. I am struggling to put my love and devotion in words, so use this as proof.

So JK Rowling. Thank you. Thank you for showing that love conquers all, but that it was to be fought for. It doesn’t come easy, and tradgey falls. Thank you for giving us hope in all things and not making anyone sparkle in the sun.

Suzanne Collins.

Thank you . Just Thank you. All those that believe these novels are based on sadistic, child killing plots. You are wrong. You are so wrong. These books couldn’t be more filled with political puns. But beside the political issues that are involved with in these words, the Hunger games has taught us so much more than that.

1.       Family comes first. This is a duh. I like to think I would do the same. I volunteer. Love you Em.

2.       Trust what you are good at. I am not good at most, and hate Emily for all her talents. But I am good at a few things. I can cook, I am great with school aged children, and I am patient. Brag Brag Brag. But I am. Oh and I am one hell of a parent. Have you seen how well behaved my child is! He listens, obeys, cleans up after himself, AND poops in the toilet. Trust what you are good at, and go after them.

3.       Trust your feelings. Katniss had thousands of feelings. But she trusted them, thought through them. Acted as best she could based on her feelings.

4.       Fight for what is right. UM DUH. She does that pretty well I think.

5.       Smile….even if you don’t feel like it.

6.       LIFE IS ABOUT WAY MORE IMPORTANT THINGS THAN BOYS AND CRUSHES.  The end. High School ends. Boys leave. Life goes on.

7.       Politics Matter. Stay informed. Find out facts, and not just the facts that go against the party you don’t like. Keep yourself truthfully informed, and don’t jump to conclusions.

8.       Your past doesn't have to determine your future. I love this. Is so true. I will just let you think about that.

www.gurl.com/2012/08/16/10-life-lessons-hunger-games/

So If you need to look for a great role model, that truly teaches you great things. Here you go. But I am not finished. I must list what Twilight teaches us. And I have to say, I truly tried to look for the good. It has some great aspects.

1.       Love is everything.

2.       Stick by your family through all your trials.

3.       Keep your friends close and treat them well.

4.       That’s all I can think of, but I am open to suggestions.

But what did it really teach us?

1.       You should marry an old, rich guy.

2.       Love two men at the same time and tell them both.

3.       Continue to go to high school over and over and over and over…cause high school is such a blast.

4.       Having a boyfriend is the most important thing.

5.       Treat your family and friends like dirt, just to be with your boyfriend.

6.       Lie to your parents ALL the time.

7.       If you are Liam Nesson’s Daughter, the best revenge for being taken, is to become a vampire, tattle on the Cullens, and then get your head ripped off, because you admitted to making a mistake and took personal responsibility.

So yeah, it teaches us a lot of good things.

But the thing that truly sparked my thoughts about blogging about these topics. The ending scene of the last Twilight. This huge, emasculate, bloody battle. People were dying. Good, close people….crap…I mean vampires. They were dying…..then it turns out…..it never really happened. It was just a future reading. NO ONE DIED. Well except for Liam Nesson’s daughter. Not even the bad guys were taken down. NO ONE DIED. I sound evil for saying this. And Brian thought I was pyscho as I was shouting at the screen, “Why didn’t anyone die? Serious, this is terrible writing! No one died.” I think were my exact words. Brian’s response…”well it’s a love story.”

False. It’s just terrible writing. I must say, some of the worst days I have had were as followed.

1.    . When Leslie Burke dies in Bridge to Teribetha. I was SOBBING. Absolutly SOBBING as I read this. I have never cried that much before. Not even in Les Mis.

2.       When the little boy in Les Mis, sacrificed his life and was singing as he crawled out of the bunker. I LOST IT. COMPLETELY LOST IT.

3.       When Dumbledore dies….and never comes back. I was at a point where I didn’t believe it. I knew he was coming back. It couldn’t be true. This man was my third grandfather. The man I look to for life advice. He can’t be gone. He can’t be out of my life.

4.       When Dobby dies. Seriously. If you didn’t cry, you have no soul.

5.       And of course….when Prim dies. Enough said.

Of course there are so many more deaths in novels that touch and reach us. But these five. These five were my family. I loved them as much. I related to them. They were my family. And these authors killed them. Why? Why would they do that?

TO MAKE THE NOVEL HIT YOUR HEART. That’s what a good novel should do. It should tear you inside and out as you read it. You should see your own life in them. You live and breathe for the characters.  The authors of these novels create a sense of family, and trials that you struggle with  and they throw even more emotion into your life, by killing these characters. Not to ruin your sense of hope, but to make them real. They are as real as you are. They die. They aren’t immortal. Stephanie Myer doesn’t have the balls to throw that emotion into your hearts. The only emotion she gives you, is horny. Great lesson. Thank you for your contribution to education and life purpose.

Thanks for reading. It was mega long and I am sorry. I am sorry if I offended you. The Twilight series is great for those that want to escape reality and read something cheesy and easy. But if you want to be affected, and lose your heart in what your read, don’t try these….at least based on the movies.

Tada.

Simple joys

I have been trying to find the joy in small things lately and be more positive and also care less of what I think people think of me. So on that note...simple joys that bring me, well joy. And I don't care what you think. Haha

1. Brian. Of course. We fight. We laugh. We have random moments of fun. But lately I don't see him. He is working his freaking ass off to support and provide our family a better future and I don't know how I would survive with out him. So I am going to stop being selfish and not worry about not spending time with him right now. That's what spring breaks, winter breaks, summer vacation and random holidays are for. At least for the next two years. Love you Brian.

2. Zach. Basically the best boy in the world. His personality is going to be out of this world. Brian doesn't see him much and just yesterday he said how different Zach is every week. I guess I don't notice because I am with him daily, all day, but he is growing. I love the silly things. Having a child development background makes me appreciate everything. He knows what fast or slow means. He understands when to blow on his food with out being told. He says please when he wants something now. His motor skills are out of this world. He took his corn dog off the stick yesterday, and as I watched, he lined the hole and stick back up and pushed it back on with out creating another hole. Motor skills of a freaking champ. He knows the difference between throw and kick. He knows lots of games and loves to play with uncle max. So many funny things, just watching him discover and figure out his world, brings me joy.

3. Jennifer Lawrence. Next to hermione granger, she is my idol. The great thing though is she is real, unlike hermione. I love that she hates acting, she thinks its stupid and doesn't understand why she gets paid to do it. She hates that everyone says its ugly to be anorexic, but she gets criticized for being the average size. I also love how down to earth and Hysterical she is. Seriously, check her out. You will fall in love.

4. AT&T and their commercials. "My grandma's slow." "I bet you would like her better if she were fast." "I bet she would like it better if she were fast." "Hmmm, give her turbo boosters" " tape a cheetah to her back." "Tap a cheetah to her back!?" "Ahmmmm"
Seriously, ask Brian. I can't watch this commercial with out breaking out in total laughter. Simple joys.

5. Property wars. I am a total nerd. I love finances and anything about them. It's a show like storage wars. People bid on homes that they can only see from the outside, then if they win, they go through the home to see what needs repairs. Some make a ton of money, others lose a bundle. Either way, it's exciting watching them walk through that door for the first time. Gets your blood pumping.

6. J k Rowling. If you read Harry potter and think it's just a magical world about three friends trying to kill an evil wizard...you're a moron. I won't explain because those of you who really understand what she has written don't need to be told. Those that don't understand, well, I won't waste my breath....I mean my fingers.

7. Tuesdays. Max has an amazing, perfect for him, beautiful girlfriend. He is going to school and working. My best friend is busy. I now understand why he was so mad at me when Brian and I were dating. I don't ever see him. Ever. Except for Tuesdays. Tuesdays he comes over, does homework, eats my food, plays with Zach and we watch The Following, New Girl, and chat about the meaning of life....haha. I love Tuesdays.

8. Pinterest. The humor section. It's fantastic. Gives me a few giggles everyday. It makes me smile each day, which I think we all need to do. It also puts what I feel into words and allows me to post something with out offending someone, yet expressing my thoughts to perfection,

9. My iPad. Just got this new toy, and seriously don't know how I ever lived with out it. The end

10. Tv shows. Working from home gives me lots of time to keep the tv on...because silence is eerie. Here are some of my favs. Parenthood. Makes me cry every time. New girl. Zooey deschanel is the best. Hilarious and adorable. Best comedy. Smash. Just found this one. It's like glee, but seven thousand times better. I live vicariously through this show because I can't sing and wish will all my will, that I could. Greys anatomy. Seriously. This show. If you're a fan, you know what I mean. Bones. She gets shot next week!!! Zooeys sister. Love her and boothe. And of course, Sportscenter. Nerd

Can't think of a Title.

Forewarning. I don’t care about your feelings, views, opinions or political standpoint. This may not go well, I don’t care. I have cried SOOOO many times since Friday and need a healthy way to express my feelings without sobbing. And so, I may offend, irate and cause some heated debates, but my blog, my 1^st amendment right, my thoughts.

I had just finished chatting with some of my students, when I heard the news of Connecticut. At first, I was in utter shock. I had just put Zach down for a nap, and well, it’s hard to relate him being in school, so I wasn’t saddened and worried about, “it could have been him”. I was sad because I student taught first graders. 6 year olds. Seriously, the most precious age ever. They are so trusting, loving and simple. They don’t worry about tragedy; they worry about what after school treat they get, or who is the line leader. So simple. I am sad, because I remember the panic my first graders went through when we prepped them for a fire drill and it didn’t happen that day, but the next day and they weren’t ready. It was chaos. They were terrified. It was a fire drill that they weren’t warned about. I can’t even imagine the absolute fear those young children felt. Total terror.

 I decided I needed to go take a shower. Why, because the shower is a safe place to absolutely sob. Which is exactly what I did. I couldn’t stop it. It just came. Why was I crying, I didn’t know any of these children. I had no idea what their hair color, eye color, names or personal favorites were. Why was I a complete and total mess?  Then I suddenly got irate. Furious. Unforgiving. I didn’t want to even see or hear about the jackass that did this. Who in their entire life have ever thought of killing 20 6 year olds just because. What in the world could any 6 year old due to a grown adult to deserve to even be thought of like that, let alone acted upon? I don’t even know any of those kids, and I can’t forgive him. Don’t think I can. Then, it hit home. I know one of the families. My cousin knows one of the families. SHIT. SHIT SHIT SHIT. I don’t know how to handle this. Every time I see a news story, or a parent getting interviewed, I start crying again. Brian and I were eating dinner at Arbys’ and an interview came on, I told him, “k we are done, let’s go” because I was starting to cry again.  It’s unbelievable. I don’t believe that people are insane; I don’t believe that people are mentally sick. Not enough to think that killing 6 year olds will fix all that. God gave us our body and our minds. We have control of that. Drugs maybe can alter your mind set, temporarily, but I truly believe that insanity is an excuse for a sick and distorted person that is completely and solely selfish to their own urges. 

It kills me so much; I can’t look at their faces. Their innocent, small, perfect 6 YEAR OLD faces. Facebook, the news, they’re everywhere. I can’t look. I don’t want to look. It makes it real. I know those pictures are of them smiling, and I can’t handle that. Can you imagine sending your child to school before Christmas break, knowing they are going to be making gingerbread houses that day, and hearing on the news that there is a mass shooting at their school. Driving down there and your child is nowhere to be found. They are unaccounted for. Having to be shown a picture of your dead child’s picture, because it’s to gruesome and heart breaking to have to identify your dead child in person.

But! Something that has helped….two things. Mrs. Soto. You are a true hero and I have read your story 15 times already. I look up to you. You are a saint; I know you are with your students and looking down on the rest of the school. If I can be half as good as you, I am lucky.

Second. Tragedies bring the country together.

That’s what I thought at least. Yes you have people, like in Ogden doing as much as they can for that poor family, but overall…what is the first thing brought up….gun control! Seriously! I am a supporter of guns, concealed weapons, I have one myself, but I am NOT going to defend any political standpoint. I am going to grieve. Can’t we grieve without bullshit politics getting in the way? China had an elementary school attacked the same day. Knife. That was the weapon. Many students were killed. It was a knife. Not a gun. Gun control is not the problem. Insensitive idiots. Grieve, mourn and sympathize with those families. At this point, I doubt any of the victims’ families are thinking that if gun control were stronger, this could have been prevented. They are thinking of their dear child, Christmas and holding their other little ones a little stronger. This school was the least likely to have had a shooting. Doors locked, security system, had to be buzzed in, ect. When evil people have a goal, they will find a way to get it done. This idiot tried to get a gun, didn’t want a back ground check. Gun control stopped him from purchasing a gun. Did its job. He stole guns. Stole his mother’s guns. Gun control is not the issue, so shut the hell up about it.

Also, canceling TV shows that deal with guns because of this, idiot?. Why not cancel all the violent shows instead. Because the TV shows about guns, are all about respect, correct handling and education.  If that’s the case, cancel cake boss, it makes people fat. Cancel Moonshiners, cancel Amish mafia, cancel the Simpsons, cancel all the CSI’s, Criminal Minds…I can’t even name all the shows that would be better off, off the air than educational gun shows. 

Like it or not, tragedies happen. This bastard had a plan and was going to carry it out. Any shooting is a tragedy. The only thing I think we can focus on, is support. It may have helped having a police officer roaming the elementary, but people would have still died. Humans kill each other. Cane and Able. It happens. It’s tragic, but we don’t hear about all that goes on. We hear about the extremely sad one, such as 20 children being killed in a slaughter. If the media didn’t glorify it, would it happen as often? If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, does it make sound? Same idea. We know it would happen, but would it happen less if we didn’t glorify it?

Lastly, I was reading some comments about Mrs. Soto, and some Shit head decided to post that “Yeah, one less teacher my taxes go to pay for.” Seriously? Are you effing seriously going to say that the day of a total anslaught of life? I try to see the best in people. It’s hard, I know there are evil people out there, but I had no idea how many evil, everyday people were roaming this planet. I wonder how sad it makes our heavenly father. He gave us our agency, which, side note, is not free. It’s just agency, and we completely abuse it. I just have to remember that I am a good person, my husband is a great person, and that my family, while crazy and crude, are the best people in my life. I don’t know what I would do with out Brian, Zach and the rest of my family, but I can tell you this. I am not a good enough person to forgive anyone that were to hurt them. 

Horse Nears of a Week

Max inspired me to blog again. It’s been awhile. I want to get back into this, but am afraid they would all be lashing out at something. So we will see.  My brother Max and I are the exact same person. Sort of.  Ha we think pretty much think exactly the same. Only difference is, he is more liberal, I am more  conservative. I am not Republican, I am not a Democrat. I support the person who I think has the best plan. I don’t cowardly vocalize my opinion on Facebook for two reasons. First, I was brought up that politics were a very private matter and you keep your opinions to yourself because there is no effective argument in politics. Each side has their opinion and neither will sway. So keep it to yourself, vote privately, don’t tell people they are bad Americans, because they don’t vote, and don’t use this many commas in a sentence….ever. Second. It’s tacky. I wonder how many of  you that based either candidates on Facebook, would have the gumption to actually go out and protest if you felt that strongly about it. Posting on Facebook is an excuse to post garbage. Like Obama raised gas prices three dollars while he was in office the first four years. That’s horse nears. Which brings me to a point.

The president of the US is not responsible, nor does he/she have the power to control each and every decision that is made in this country. Just because one person is in a certain office, doesn’t mean our country is going down the crap shoot. If it did mean that, we would be 1940 Germany. I hate when politics and religion mix. It used to be great. “In God we trust”, was basically written in stone. There was a mutual understanding….sort of ish. What I mean to say, is we live in this country because of our religious freedom. That DOES NOT mean you get to judge and belittle those that are either a different religion, or your same religion and see politics in a different light.  I hate, LOATHE Facebook sometimes. I made a single post once on how I was tired of seeing garbage posts like the one I previously stated, and got thrown into the lion’s den for it. Most of the posts about either political party are incorrect and yet people use them to bash not only the candidate, but anyone else who believes in that person. I was toId I needed to move to Iraq and see how I liked it there and was told I was un-American. For you to bash on me like that because you can hid behind your stupid, standing in front of a mirror, Facebook profile, well that’s proof Facebook is full of cowards.

My brother wrote that he was ashamed to be a Mormon because of the hypocrisy that was going on that night. I wish he would have stated that a little better. He meant he was ashamed of how some of the LDS communities/ people were portraying the entire religion, which affected him the very next day. He has various, LDS disliking friends, and after seeing all the garbage (I am really trying not to swear, how am I doing?) they made comments to him the next day about it. Any missionary will tell you, Utah Mormons suck. Sorry. But it’s a status thing. Being a Mormon in Utah is the thing to do. It’s easy. Everyone does it, and yet we are hypocrites. I include myself in there. I judge, I swear, I break the Sabbath. I am not perfect. I need to try harder. But I respect people enough to not bash on them. Regardless of what my beliefs politically are, I “trust in God”, and believe in our leaders. I believe in our LDS leaders. They say support, and pray for our president, fine. Done. I am not worried, I am not moving to Canada, and I am not bashing the president. He doesn’t control the world. I wanted Romney to win. He had things I didn’t agree with. He went back and forth on some things, but I thought his financial plan, which at this point needs a lot of help, was better. But he didn’t win. I am sad, because losing sucks, but I didn’t agree with him on every little aspect. I hate the labels. I am going to trust that when our prophet says we can pray and support whoever is in charge, things will work out. When he says it’s time to not trust that man or women anymore, that’s when I will worry. There are so many better things to stress about, than who is president of the United States. I will worry about teaching Zach right and wrong. Worry about my family’s future, and worry if my fantasy football team is going to win this week. Worrying is stupid. Why not trust and believe in something. Trust in Katniss. Trust in Hermione. Whomever you need to trust, do it. I will trust our LDS leaders and follow what they say.

Thanks and GO RSL!

Watching soccer games. Zach sure lives to play.

Please check out my photo. Check out this application: https://market.android.com/details?id=com.roidapp.photogrid Sent from my Android.

Leaving Facebook

I left and for now will re join blogger now that it has an app.